Assalamualaikum peeps! Whats up? Wow it has been awhile since my last post here on my blog. Berhabuk tak? xP Cant remember the last time i actually logged in but thanks to my boyfriend for reminding me. Well, technically he didnt remind me to update my blog but he has a wordpress now and he wanted me to follow his wordpress and then i realised that i havent post anything here so here i am!

It is semester break right now and i am currently decomposing in my house!!! I am so bored. So lets do some rant here or a few updates on life? How's life? I dont know, duh. Theres tons of shit happened after my last update. SSHHHIITTT TONS OF DRAMAS. I got into a fight with my friends (but were good now), met a new friend that actually just wanted to ruin my life (kicked her out of my life already) apologized to 'used-to-be-bff' cause i tak suka bermusuh (but we arent going to be closed like we used to) oh god, and many more....... 

i lost myself. i dont feel like myself anymore guys. i feel like shit. i feel like this is not me. i lost myself trying to love someone. what should i do? i want to run away so bad but i dont have the courage to do that. lol lets get a bit personal here.

i love him, he loves me. but surprisingly, im tired. im tired of chasing someone's attention. i know and i am aware that he loves me. but im done chasing him. im scared that he'll get bored of me but sampai bila i nak takut? i takut sangat kehilangan someone sampai i hilang diri i. i love him so much, but i dont feel like im one of his priorities anymore. no, he doesnt have anyone else besides me, he has been so loyal to me and im really grateful for that. but i rasa kosong. i rasa macam i sayang dia sangat sampai i tak fikir my health, my happiness and etc.

well, i didnt text him today. i nak text dia, but everytime i nak text dia niat i terbantut sebab fikirkan yang dia akan reply lambat for so many hours. once i text dia, i akan buat diri i tertunggu tunggu and it will hurt me. at this point i rasa macam, i lagi rela feel the pain of not texting him rather than the pain of waiting for his replies. at least i know hes not ignoring my text. wow u guys can call me stupid.

but u know what worse? kalau i cakap semua ni dekat dia, i bet dia akan tinggalkan i. and i dont want that to happen. i buntu i taktahu nak buat apa. theres nothing i can do to keep a man if that man dont want to be kept. but i really pray to god that he wont leave me, i want to spend every moments that i have w him.

i taktahu nak buat apa, i takkan tinggalkan dia. but i takut nak tegur dia sebab nanti i yang sakit. so i diamkan diri.. if you guys have any suggestion (other than asking me to leave him bcs i wont) pls let me know okay?

xoxo, Nisa

Assalamualaikum!! harini bosan nau la takde class so i think i want to do a review on one of the The Ordinary serum that i've tried. This product tengah hype gila on the internet. Niacinamide, a vitamin B3, a good ingredients for regulation of sebum production, improves redness and blotchiness in the skin, minimise skin fine lines, hyperpigmentation and improve skin barrier! Siapa je taknak kan those benefits in just one product?

So basically, i have an acne-prone skin, oily and dehydrated skin. And i tengok banyak gila good feedbacks even Liah Yoo pun cakap this is her HG ingredients. I pun nak try la bcs i tengah nak 'baiki' my skin since my 2018 resolution is to have a clear skin (prayforme). So start february haritu my skin is behaving and getting better, my skin dah 80% clear, no bumps, no active acnes. I bought this the end of january and dia sampai on 17th february tak silap i. so i terus pakai malam tu excited punya pasal sampai tak patch test kau! haa gelojoh.

First impression, thick sikit dari alpha arbutin so i pakai lepas alpha arbutin sebab ramai suggest macam tu sis ikut je. lepas apply tu dia cam sticky sikit but i tak kisah sangat pasal sticky ni for me its normal. i baring and few minutes lepastu tiba tiba muka i gatal gilaaaaa! srs gatal. oh yea lupa nak cakap, the day i pakai ni i ada satu clogged pore on my cheeks. okay back to the story, esoknya i bangun my face tak oily pun and one whole day my face macam matte, takde oily cam selalu (i tak keluar satu hari tu) i cam wow best ah! okay lepastu the next day, i pakai lepas AA lagi but i notice dia jadi macam soapy bila i blend it into my skin, i cam cuak alamak elok lagi ke benda ni haahahah pastu on 3rd day, i perasan my clogged pore tu tibatiba jadi jerawat, i lek je dulu kan. malam tu i try pakai niacinamide alone without AA sbb nak tengok still soapy ke, yes still soapy so i think this product sesuai dab je kot. 4th day, my jerawat yang semalam tu dah masak tapi ttbe banyak pulak jerawat naik T.T i pun pelik ah tak silap i niacinamide isnt an active ingredients and wont cause purging, i dok google je tau pasal ni hari hari bcs idk if my skin breaking out ke apa. hari ke 5, my skin naik jerawat lagi i benciiiikkk so i fikir i stop dulu lah sampai my skin dah okay i try balik.

So on 5th march i try pakai balik, tak gatal dah, esoknya i bangun my skin cam nice gila. so i pun cam okay cun malam tu pakai lagi, esoknya okay lagi. i ada borak2 dengan my roommate pasal niacinamide since dia pun pakai and dia pun cakap dia first time pakai ada gatal gatal pastu naik jerawat. i dengan dia taktahu nak teruskan ke nak stop so kitorang teruskan je. lepastu esoknya DAH NAMPAK DAH JERAWATNYA NAIK ALLAHU, hari kelima again, naik jerawat banyaaaakkkk so i rasa i nak stop. idk if i nak try next time ke nak stop terus sebab i really wanna love this product. i know people said kena pakai 2 weeks tapi i cannot tahan tengok my face naik jerawat sana sini. i know this product wont cause purging but entahlah. idk if its because of the high concentration for a first timer ke i memang tak sesuai dengan this product. but i know ramai suka gila benda ni. AND I HATE IT I TAK BOLEH NAK SUKA BENDA NI UGH

now i tengah nak heal my breakouts, wish me luck T.T

xoxo, Nisa